'Tis the season

beautiful photo credits

 ♡ 

You can't do much when you're in love. You think of one person as your whole world and it wouldn't matter much to you if you are or aren't together. Suddenly, your day consists of waiting to spot them in a crowd; adoring the way their nose scrunches up when they laugh. Looking back at the clock, counting the hours till you get to see them again. There's always the excitement; the feeling of eagerness rushing through you. You just can't wait to be able to see or speak to them, even if it's only for a measly 5 minutes. Because to you, that 5 minute talk would make your whole day.

Thing is, neither love nor life would always work that way. If it did, everyone would be paired with a loved one and every relationship would be a cheesy romantic comedy. With being in love, comes the rollercoasters of emotions, doubts and troubles. There's always going to be that one person who tries to get in between you and them. There are always going to be fights consisting of tear soaked pillows and spending nights silently wishing that you could just take back your words. Head tucked to your knees, waiting for their calls or texts, telling you that they miss you and that they are sorry. Ego is a hell of a drug. If you love them, you go for it. You try your hardest to make things work, to have things piece back together as one. Say, when a thing you treasure breaks, you don't just throw it away. You try to fix it as much as you possibly can. In the process, you may get cuts and bleed but in the end, wouldn't it all be worth it? The fact that you are still able to have that treasured item, I mean.

I think everyone has their idea of happiness and in that vision, they see the person they love. Honestly, unless you're married, hopes are a pretty dangerous thing to have. Even then, there are marriages that break. People envy elderly couples that have spent years and years together. You can envy them all you want but you have to remember that to have what they have, you've got to get yourself together and work for your relationship no matter the ups and downs. Yes, God chooses our match but unless you put effort, nothing is going to come out of it, as with other things in life as well.

You know, there are those instances where you realize the random amount of couples breaking up in the same span of time. This year and in my eyes, it was June. Suddenly, my whole group of friends lost their partners (including myself) which was weird. Moving on, I was scrolling through twitter the other day and saw a friend's tweet which went, "Is it cheating season?" and I realized oh. The amount of things relating to cheating before I saw it suddenly seemed a little more relevant now. I know this is just biased thinking but hey ho, doesn't change the fact that cheating is sadly pretty common nowadays.

I don't know how people do it. As I've said before, cheaters are selfish. They want the whole world and yet, they still want you. You'd think that when you have someone who loves you and shows it as well, that you wouldn't even dare to imagine the fact that behind your back, they could do such a thing. That's what makes it worse I guess. Feeling the love as if nothing's wrong and afterwards when you know the real thing, it would just hit and break you even more than it would if the relationship had been a little more than rocky and you just kinda more than likely could expect it happening. Sad, it really is. Cheating is the worse thing a person could possibly do, relationship wise. Not only do you lose trust (in your partner/having people lose trust in you) but you also lose someone who loved you with their heart. To them, you are their world and in your eyes, your idea of 'my world' is split into half between two people. Imagine how hurtful that is to know that secretly, you have been having to share the person you love with someone else.

I know there are people who even after everything and knowing the truth about their cheating partner,  would still stay. I've seen a saying/quote type thing which said

"Being loyal is being there for them when they have $5 and $500, not being there after they cheated on you 500 times." 

Letting go is hard, accepting the fact that all this time there has been someone else is harder. Often times, you'd end up hating the girl/guy (the one they cheated you on) more than your actual partner who even though having you, decided to go for it anyway. Althooooough, the other person isn't totally out of the deep-pit-of-anger as well. If you know that he/she has already taken, why why and why would you even have the slightest idea to go for them. Do you want that to happen to you? Do you want to be cheated on? Do you want to have to know how it feels like to be able to realize what you're doing is wrong? No, I don't think so. 

On your (cheating partner's partner ^) side, you may feel like you have the world, like you're better than the other person because their partner liked you more but get over yourself. You just don't realize how horrible you are in being that way. You don't know how broken you leave another person feeling.  

You don't know how sad and useless they feel, constantly questioning what went wrong, and constantly crying tears of anger at the fact that they don't feel good enough. Even after everything, I know that in the end, you're just clinging on to that last string of hope that maybe, just maybe..

they'd love you back again.

xx